Life’s Lessons July 3, 2008

Today, I happened to visit a friend’s blog about the song “Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen). I’ve heard it perhaps a million times already but everytime I play it, I am still moved by the message just like the first time I ever heard it =) It has life’s lessons that are surely noteworthy. What a brilliant writer Mary Schmich is!

Here’s the lyrics:

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ‘97… wear sunscreen.

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If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it.

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The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.

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I will dispense this advice now.

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Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.

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You are NOT as fat as you imagine.

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Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

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Do one thing every day that scares you.

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Sing.

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Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

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Floss.

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Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.

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Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

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Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

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Stretch.

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Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.

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Get plenty of calcium.

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Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.

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Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s.

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Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

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Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

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Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

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Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

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Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for good.

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Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

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Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

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Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

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Travel.

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Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

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Respect your elders.

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Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

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Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you’re 40, it will look 85.

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Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

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But trust me on the sunscreen.

Endlessly wishing… March 20, 2008

At 5, I wished I could let the time fly so I can go to school and own a cute bag, nice notebooks and pencils.

 

At 10, I wished I could let the time fly so I can be in high school and enjoy parties like my older sisters.

 

At 15, I wished I could let the time fly so I can be in college and live away from my parents to enter the university…then I can enjoy more independence.

 

At 18, I was elated to be entitled of more freedom and control of my life. I can do some things without needing my parent’s consent. Yet, I wished I could still let the time fly so I can finish my studies, work and earn money…then I can have total independence.

 

At 21, I finished a degree, found work and earned money. I achieved total independence indeed.

 

But as time goes by, I reckoned that independence comes with countless responsibilities – bills to pay, food to eat, career plans and so on. Life became apparently complex…then I began to miss the time when I don’t worry about anything but play.

 

Now, from time to time, I wish I could go back to be 5 again

what has LOVE got to do with it? February 4, 2008

 

 

 

LOVE is blind – a puzzling phrase I should say. It is said to originate from Shakespeare’s The Merchant of Venice -“But love is blind and lovers cannot see…”

 

Can a lover not really see? Did he/she choose not to see? Or can he/she really see “beyond” what is evident?

 

Well, I have nothing against this phrase when it is used in a “positive” context. An example would be: loving someone despite of his/her disabilities, weaknesses, imperfections and the like. This is something admirable, don’t you agree?

 

Other than that, I believe the phrase can be equated to idiocy or dependency.

 

I’ve heard and witnessed many despicable stories like:

• A lover believes his/her partner when he/she denies the cheating even if he/she was caught-in-the-act;
• A wife unwaveringly accepts philandering hubby every after failed relationship with other women;
• A mother cannot give-up her daughter’s stepfather even if he shamelessly rapes her;
• A battered wife can never leave her drunkard and unemployed husband;

These miserable tales may go on and on and it may come from people close to you. Many times, you just get exasperated because you can never give enough counsel to help her/him get out of the situation. You even come to the point when you become your friend’s enemy because you’re against it all. You feel powerless because you are aware that nobody can HELP your friend but herself/himself alone. You are just there to guide but the decision is hers/his.

 

And so you ask WHY oh WHY this happens??? Even your friend don’t know why he/she can’t stop himself/herself…and ending up with the thought that LOVE defies reasons and that it is BLIND indeed.

 

Is it really??? I don’t believe so! Perhaps the fear of being alone fuels it all which consequently leads to denial and clinging. One embraces a little light of hope even if it’s a tall tale just to keep his/her partner. Love definitely has very little to do with it for Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the TRUTH (I Corinthians 13:6)…LOVE shouldn’t be hurtful nor destructive. It should bring out the best in you!

 

 

Dreams January 16, 2008

Reflection: “What do I really want?” January 4, 2008

Have you ever got a feeling that you don’t really know what you want? When you are on the verge of wanting to change career or whatever? or Just wanting something else???

Today, I came to reflect and recognize I have endless wants, desires, aims, etc. I believe this is not reflective of unhappiness of what or where I am now because I am contented – life is good in general and I am thankful for my husband, my family, my friends and everyone who touched and made my life more meaningful. However, my contentment doesn’t mean I am complacent with everything because I cannot STOP trying to BE better. If by chance and fate I’ll succeed, great! If not, I’ll try and try and try…There’s a place I wanna be, a person I wanna be and yet it is undefined and it is boundless.

In my opinion, we are all alike; we never get satisfied with everything – little things, major things and what have you. At some point, we will want something and we just don’t stop…but then again, I don’t know. I can only speak for myself =D

My drama mode today made me wrote this poem: